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Unmasking A Veiled Source of Marital Woes



Michael West

By Michael West
A lot of people are suffering in diverse ways, in particular, in their marital pursuits but not due to their own wrongdoings. They labour, sweat and work so hard to make things work out but their efforts are not yielding desired results.

Tales of agony and frustration daily characterise their situations. They often wonder on how they came about their helpless circumstances. I do hope many lives will be liberated through this insight.

I’m a proponent of parental inputs in the process leading to marriage. Relationships supported by parents have turned out more successful than the ones they opposed. Being human, some of the parents’ choices may not have been the best or have actually been a regret but when juxtaposed by the ones they supported, the success rate is much higher. Parents are people of immense experience. They are endowed with natural instincts to decipher potential good mates for their children. Parents are passionately committed to the well-being of their children, hence they would stop at nothing to support, defend and provide for their needs wherever and whenever they are able to do so.
This same passion for the good of their children apparently lured many parents into tying their children’s destinies or future into covenants or vows. Consequently, the innocent children (now adults) will start contending with unknown source(s) of battles and challenges in their lives especially in the area of marriage.

I know a pretty woman who had the issue of failed relationships consistently. A born again believer for that matter. She was aghast the day she discovered that her parents had married her off to Ifa (god of divination) while she was a few weeks old as a baby. That was when she was able to break free from the spiritual chains that tied her down from getting married. Today, she is a mother of children.

A 49 years old woman had a smooth sail in her studies; at age 22, she had graduated. Barely four years later, she was ready for marriage after obtaining her Master of Arts degree in her discipline but alas, no stable relationship that could endure into marriage. Consistent breakup in her relationships became her lot. Initially she was not bothered thinking she’s still young with a well-paid job. “It is a matter of time. Things will fall into pleasant places for me in due course.” That was her consolation. Months rolled into years without making headway in her relationship. She finally got delivered 20 years after on her 46th birthday. She had a dream and saw her late mother praying while facing the altar inside a church. In the dream, her mom was about five months pregnant. She had vowed that her baby will never leave the denomination, and as long as she abides by that, everything about her life shall be smooth, peaceful, timely and successful. And if she veers off the track, until she returns to the fold, things will go the opposite direction for her.

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After she woke up, she headed straight to a parish of the church around where she lived in Lagos. She grew up in the church way back in her home town. Barely three months later, she met a guy in the course of her official duty; in less than six months, formal introduction took place. Exactly nine months later, they were in a registry for their wedding. As you read this, she is a mother of two beautiful children and the marriage is solidly moving on well. She took the step without consulting anybody. It then dawned on her that the covenant her mom made while she was still a foetus was working in her life unknowingly.

Meanwhile, while living and working in Lagos after graduation, she started attending another church of her choice. That was when she started experiencing challenges. At some point, her job was seriously threatened. She almost lost her job if not for the mercy of God.

A man was bedeviled with constant job losses. He ventured into business and he ended up in huge debts. He later discovered that his mother had warned that he should not marry from a particular tribe which he ignored. Thank God his mother was alive at the time and a solution was found. I have some other cases that space constraint would not permit me to share.

Many people are experiencing intractable course of challenges and they are almost giving up on their situations as efforts made at solutions appear to be a nullity. They have prayed, fasted and have had several deliverance sessions, yet, it seems they’re not getting results. Not a few people have attended seminars, conferences and counseling sessions all to no avail. Some have even gone outside their faiths to seek help elsewhere, yet, their conditions remain daunting. However, to every human problem, there is a solution but not without knowing the source. Identifying the source or sources of problems either physical, situational or spiritual is the easiest way to solution.

I have encountered cases of seeming hopeless situations which through diligent investigations solutions have been found, all to the glory of God. Every aspect of human life matters; but the key areas that people easily recognise challenges are in the areas of career or business, marriage and health. These are the three cardinal pegs of adult life. Encountering challenges at these junctures are so prevalent such that it is easy for some people to accuse (wrongly or rightly) whoever they suspect to be behind their afflictions. Unfortunately, those commonly accused are mothers, wives, in-laws, unfriendly neighbours and extended family members. I want to admit that in a few instances, it is possible that such people may be unknowingly found complicit, while in several other cases they are indeed innocent but wrongly accused or suspected. The fact remains that we live in a world that is ruled by forces beyond the ordinary.

In some of the recent cases, I discovered that the reason why some mothers are being accused or suspected was because they are involved in the making of vows or covenants in times of need or sorrow; and, under emotional excitement, they tie their vows to the future of their innocent children. These children were not told about what lies ahead of them. Later in life things will begin to go awry with them when they go contrary to the terms of the vows or covenants their parents had entered into.

I want to appeal to parents to open up to their struggling and jinxed children in case anything like that had happened in the past. Adult children should also gently approach their parents to find out if such a spiritual deal exists on their behalf. This situation affects almost every aspect of their lives but it is mostly noticeable in the areas of marital adventure and economic life.

It is never too late to unmask the veiled source of the problem and neutralise the effects. For it is written: “Affliction will not rise a second time.” (Nahum 1: 9). Therefore, the yoke of marital failure and other impossibilities shall be broken by the reason of the anointing in the power of God Almighty. (Isaiah 10:27). Do have a victorious weekend.

“Encountering challenges at these junctures are so prevalent such that it is easy for some people to accuse (wrongly or rightly) whoever they suspect to be behind their afflictions.”

• West wrote via [email protected] 08059964446


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